MY BLOG HAS MOVED!

Thanks for visiting my blog. I have moved to www.funnymamaink.wordpress.com.


Come and visit! Coffee's always on.

A Video to Say Hello!

I just wanted to say hi and thanks for coming to visit me at my blog. You can also find me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

Have a great day!

Secondary Infertility - An Ache That Burns Deep

Since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to be a mom. I even remember wanting to steal my daycare lady's baby and keep her as my own at the age of 9. Ha! I swear I'm not creepy. I just loved babies so, so much. That sweet smell, those big, beautiful eyes, those soft chubby cheeks. Sigh... They are so cute when they are tiny and new.

Fast forward almost 20 years later to when I met my husband. We had discussed children early on, and I made it pretty clear that children had always been part of my life plan. So within a few months of getting married, I was fortunate to get pregnant with our daughter after only trying for one month. Wow, that was easy! The pregnancy wasn't a walk in the park but, by the end, we had the most beautiful little girl with the biggest, roundest blue eyes I'd ever seen. We were over the moon!

Within a few years we were ready to start trying for another child so Z would have a sibling. I wanted my children to be a few years apart so it was time to start trying. I had gotten pregnant so easily with Z that I was sure my husband would just look at me funny and I'd be pregnant. Well, that did not happen.

We tried for a few years and nothing was happening. I had mentioned the issue to my doctor after about the first year and she said, "pray and keep trying. You'll get pregnant eventually." Wrong. I prayed, I wished, I hoped, we tried and nothing happened. To make matters worse, everyone I knew was getting pregnant. And each time I heard the news, it felt like a dagger in my heart. Why was it so easy for everyone else but me? Why was my body failing me? I spent many days lying in my bed in a pool of tears, empty, sad and feeling like a failure.

And no matter what anyone says, secondary infertility isn't any less painful than someone who is infertile and hasn't had children. I remember feeling guilty for my sadness because I already had a baby, and I wondered what right I had to be so devastated by this inability to conceive for a second time. People would say, "well at least you have one baby." To me it didn't matter. There was such a huge hole in my heart. So don't ever apologize for how you feel. The pain is just as raw.

Eventually, my doctor referred us to a fertility clinic and, I'm happy to say, I did eventually get pregnant after being on a fertility drug. The tests, the side effects of the drugs and the costs didn't make it the easiest process ever but I was so thankful to have my darling little boy.

I wish I had been given advice about using a holistic and natural approach to fertility rather than settling with the medical interventions we eventually had to turn to. I so appreciate what those amazing doctors did for me but I wish I had this alternative when I was first battling infertility.

Pregnancy Miracle was developed by Lisa Olson: a nutrition specialist, health consultant, Chinese medicine researcher and author who battled with infertility herself. Her system has helped thousands of women, just like you, permanently reverse their infertility, get pregnant quickly and give birth to healthy children. 

Whether you're in your 30s or 40s, have had tubal obstructions, variances in your hormone levels, a partner with low sperm count, a history of miscarriages, or uterine or fibroid cysts, this might make a difference for you.

Click here to see a video that might give you new hope for the happy ending you deserve.

Grievance Du Jour

I just finished sorting the laundry to get it ready for washing, and I can't help but notice that all of my family, especially my husband and daughter, take their clothes off inside out. Now when it's time to fold, I have to put all their clothes back to normal.

I've decided they hate me.

If you're looking for me tonight, I'll be in my basement, folding laundry. Forever.

What Happened to My Norman Rockwell Moment?

Do you hear that delicious silence? You probably don't hear it over your gaggle of children but, currently in my house, I can actually hear the clock ticking on my piano. That's always an indicator of how quiet my house actually is. It's such a pretty clock, isn't it?

Alleluia for Grandparents

The reason it's quiet here right now, at this very moment in time, is because my children are spending the afternoon and evening with my mom. God bless her for taking them for a few hours so I can just suck in the glory of my house without children ransacking it and filling it with their polluted sounds of fighting and complaining. My children really are lovely... with other people... most of the time. Lately however, when they are at home, they just sucks every morsel of life and energy I have. I'm thankful for this few hours to refuel and refocus. Shout out to grandparents!!!

I'm also thankful that my mom came with us to the mall today to see the big man himself, Santa Claus. As she told me, "I haven't done this in 30 years." I'm glad I could help bring back those warm and fuzzy memories for her, living the excitement through her grandchildren's eyes.

Not What I Pictured

I always have these huge plans for these picture perfect activities for us to do as a family. In my mind, I always imagine everything running like a Disney movie - the perfect setting, a lesson learned, and beautiful memories I can put in a box with a pretty bow, and store in my mind until I'm old and grey where I will relive them as I sit in my rocking chair with my grandchildren on my lap. Sigh... The life of an optimist....

The reality is that almost none of the activities I plan for us to do, no matter how awesome and exciting they might sound, ever turn out like the rosy pictures I conjure up in my little head. Never. Ever. I personally blame the three-year-old with an attitude.

How It Plays Out

We're not even out our own door and the always-cranky baby B (who is now 3) exclaims like he does every 3 hours, "I am so mad!" By the way, he got that line from an episode of Daniel Tiger's Neighbourhood where Daniel Tiger's teacher, or mom, or somebody tells Daniel, in sing song of course, "if you feel so mad, that you want to roar, take a deep breath, and count to four." Great advice from the show but the only part my son retained was Daniel Tiger saying "I'm so mad!" at the top of his lungs. Thanks PBS. You're awesome.

Once I've convinced him to put his boots on (usually by bribing him with food or a toy), I get him and the girl and the husband into the car, ready to roll. But wait... The husband forgot his phone, or keys, or wallet - it can be any of said items or a combination of said items. Considering I have to remember everything else, it'd be nice if I didn't have to take care of the other adult in the house too. Just sayin'.

The car ride is usually a nightmare with cranky baby B screaming at his sister for looking at him funny, or my 8-year-old daughter Z complaining that she doesn't like the music on the radio. I yell at them to be quiet. They do not make an effort. I'm irritated. Can we go home?

We get to our activity, let's take visiting Santa, since that's what we did today. The kids are starving because they haven't eaten in 20 minutes. So we have to get food at the mall. Because they are dressed in their Christmas outfits to have their pictures taken with Santa, they inevitably spill ketchup and wipe fry grease all over their brand new clothes.

We take them to the bathroom to clean them up. Baby B, who has just learned to go potty, pees on his pants because he does not know how to control that male appendage of his I just don't get. (Why does it shoot in so many directions?) I clean him off as best as I can and hope that Santa doesn't get pee on his lap. (I'm sure it wouldn't be the first time anyway. Poor Santa!) Z is filthy so we have to hose her down from top to toe, and tuck her hair back into the braids I meticulously spun before we left.

As we are walking to see Santa, which is in the centre of the mall, we pass by stores that are calling my kids' names. They see all the shiny and flashy objects and get distracted so we keep having to get them back in line like sheep dogs herding their flock.

We finally get in line to see Santa, and the two of them just can't sit still. My kids have a lot of energy and never stop moving. Plus, kids and lines just don't go together. Ever. They shuffle around the line in the area we're standing in, just hyper with excitement as they can see the top of Santa's hat around the corner.

We finally get to the front of the line and cranky pants Mr. B. does not want to see Santa. So I drag him a little, bribe him with yet another treat (Santa's candy cane), and wait for the magical moment when the nice picture lady can snag a shot of them sitting up on Santa's lap. Well, they were sitting. And their clothes look sort of clean. Baby B looks constipated, and Z looks drunk but we got the picture, I guess. Another family trip over. Another dream of a perfect outing crushed.

Life Is Never Picture Perfect

I know life is not the perfect pictures we see in movies, and that it's super messy, and hard, and some days, down right shitty. It's not my kids' faults that things don't turn out the way I imagine. It's my OWN fault. My creative, overly-perfectionist brain has a way of concocting these scenarios that no real family could live up to. I have to learn to lower my expectations, and just live in the moment. Because when I'm old and grey, sitting in my rocking chair on the front porch, looking back on this picture of my two babies, I won't remember the chaos that took place getting them to that moment. All I'll remember when I look at those pictures are those two beautiful kids and how they were, and will always be, the most magical part of my world. And I'm very lucky to have them in it.

What I'll Do For A Discount!

My friend Jill own's the Real Deals on Home Decor store in Winnipeg and, in order to get 15% off my purchase a few weeks ago, she asked me to sing for her Facebook promotion. And making a special appearance is my little guy, baby B.

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=819842394704884&set=vb.700611633294628&type=2&theater

If you're in the Winnipeg area, make sure you check out Real Deals on Home Decor. Adorable shabby chic decor at super reasonable prices!

Have a good night y'all!

Keeping Up With The Joneses - No Thanks!

I had a conversation with a friend yesterday afternoon on my way home from work. She was in a financial challenge group I had on Facebook and had a few questions she wanted to ask about budgeting. As we got to talking a bit more, we got on the topic of "keeping up with the Joneses", and at what point do we just try to be happy with enough.

I remember when we were going to buy our first house in a little town north of Winnipeg. We had sold my husband's condo and we're looking to build our first home together. My husband had a lot of equity poured into his condo - it was basically paid for and he made a lot of money when we sold it. The realtor could not fathom why we didn't want to buy a $300,000 home! The bank would easily lend us the money to build a mansion if we wanted to so why would we "settle" for a $130,000 home? She looked at us like we had monkey's flying out of our ears. Seriously.

It was simple. We were two people with no kids. Although we knew we wanted kids eventually, this new little bi-level would still accommodate our family even if it wasn't huge with an extra bedroom, outdoor kitchen and butler's quarters. (ha....) We were pretty firm that we did not want to be house poor. The two of us had pretty decent jobs at the time and we knew that this home would be a good fit for us. We didn't need more rooms than people. It's not just the financial aspect of it but from an environmental stand point, I really do care about my carbon footprint and I don't need to use more resources to have a fancy house I can brag about to my friends. Arrogance.... That's another topic for another day.

Eventually we did move to a "bigger" house. We went from 900 square feet to 1500 square feet but this house was a two-storey so the space on each level is only about 700 square feet. The reason for the move was more about being closer to family and moving back to the area where I grew up. I love my "little birdhouse" - that's what the people in the big expensive houses in our town call ours. I'm sure most of them look at us and think, "one day they'll move up in the world, those poor people." Truth of the matter is that because our mortgage wasn't outrageous, and we didn't have a ton of bills, I was able to stay home part-time with both my kids, and I still work part-time to this day. Our house isn't massive but it's just the right size for the four of us, our two cats and our one dog. And by working part-time, I've been able to find the right balance to take the stress off our family by taking care of most of the household duties during my days off, leaving more down time on the weekends for us to just BE.

Our birdhouse

The other reason I like my modest house is that we don't have a lot of room for "stuff". I hate clutter, I hate extra things hanging around that I don't use so, for me, a house with a finite amount of storage is good for my soul. I have a real problem with people's obsessions with new, shiny, expensive things. Or the "if it's broken, throw it out and buy a new one" mentality. I am a big fan of buying used for two obvious reasons: 1. It's economical 2. It cuts down on my carbon footprint. Why would I buy a brand new shirt for $40 when I can buy my kids brand name, secondhand clothes for $2 at our local thrift store? Do they care? Not yet but I'm sure they will be a bit more resistant to it as they get older. I'd like to think I'm grooming them from a young age to be mindful of the legacy they leave behind for their kids and grandkids. We'll see if that pans out! By teaching them about being responsible with money and learning budgeting skills, I feel like we are setting them up for to be successful adults. Again, I hope this pans out.

I also buy secondhand furniture, yes, I even bought a secondhand couch. Read this post to see how I decorated our newly-finished basement with mostly gently used items I bought off Kijiji, thrift stores and garage sales. I'm pretty proud of it actually :)

When I look at some of the big houses in our town with their $450,000 price tags, I think - how many CEOs live here? The truth is, most of these people aren't CEOs. I know this because I know some of these families. They have similar incomes to ours yet I keep seeing shiny boats, new cars and expensive toys in their driveways. I really don't get what I'm missing here. How can people afford all this stuff? I guess for some people, that's what makes them happy. No matter the cost.

I'm kind of excited to think I'm going to have my mortgage paid off soon and that I'll have no debt, living in my little birdhouse. I'm also excited to think about the comfortable retirement I'll have, and the great education my kids will get for free because I didn't sink every penny I had into paying for a house that was unnecessarily large for our family. My goal is to stay in this house until my kids decide to move out. At that point maybe we'll downsize, or maybe we'll stay where we are and wait for our grandkids to fill our house with love and laughter. It's not a mansion to most, but what's within the walls of this home is what is more important than the walls that surround it.

What are your thoughts? Big fancy house or a modest, cozy home?

A Language of His Own

At two-years of age, my little blonde-haired, blue-eyed man was not the strongest of talkers at the park. Who are we kidding? Despite all the babbling that came out of his adorable heart-shaped mouth, Benny could barely string together two words that sounded remotely close to the English language.

His sister, on the other hand, who is 5 years older than him, began to speak clearly and in full sentences by the age of 18 months. So I had to question, what did I do differently with this one to make him so hard to understand? Had I ignored him more than my daughter? Was his IQ just a little lower than his sister’s? Maybe I hadn’t given him enough healthy fats to help his brain develop. I knew I should have thrown a few extra avocados in his baby nutrition.

As time went on, everyone I knew had to mention how Ben was hard to understand. “Don’t worry,” they’d say. “It’s because he’s the second child and he’s a boy.” Apparently boys get a bad rap in the linguistics department. “It’ll get better,” every one would say.

I decided that I wasn’t too concerned… yet. I had seen other kids around his age who weren’t super gifted with words. I decided I wasn’t going to worry too much about it. At least not for a while.

Then one day, something miraculous happened while my kids were playing at the park. Ben was digging in the sand when another little guy his age walked up to him and starting digging in the sand too. They both had matchbox cars, and they were about the same age. They were making all the appropriate noises as they raced their little cars in the sandbox.

Then Ben started chatting with his new little friend in his jibber jabber sort of way. I was pretty sure the other kid would look at him with a blank stare on his face. But instead, he started talking back to him… In the same Ben-like language! Oh my gosh - they understand each other, I thought. They speak the SAME language!

I quickly rushed my 8-year-old over to show her this amazing exchange of baby talk. She looked at me with a big smile on her face. We were both so excited to see someone who really understood what our little Benny was saying.

The boys continued to play for a few minutes when I noticed the other little guy’s mom come sit closer. I smiled at her and said, “isn’t it so cute that they are speaking their own special language?” The lady looked at me, gave me a little smile and nodded her head politely. She must be shy, I thought. Not much of a talker. Oh well. Not everyone is.

A few minutes passed when I realized I needed to get home. I called Zoe and Ben and said it was time to go. Ben said goodbye to his new pal, and his little buddy walked towards his mom. As he approached her, I could hear him talking to her in his adorable baby babble. So cute, I thought. But then, the mom responded to him. And she was talking the same language! But then it hit me. The little boy wasn’t speaking in baby talk, he was speaking another language, a real language that just happened to sound exactly like Ben’s toddler dialect. Urgh… Who’s the biggest dork in the world? Ya, that would be me. I grabbed my kids, not looking back, and headed for home. I’m an idiot, I thought. A big one.

At what age did you child(ren) start to speak clearly? Were you concerned with delayed language skills?

My Journey Living with Health Anxiety

This week I've had breast cancer, pancreatic cancer and skin cancer. Or at least I've had it in my mind. That's because I'm a huge hypochondriac - a.k.a. a person who suffers with health anxiety. I know hypochondriacs are always depicted as goofy, over-the-top, compulsive types on sitcoms but being a hypochondriac is sometimes very debilitating and lonely. It can consume your every thought and make you completely miserable, and subsequently, affect the people around you.

I think I've always been a bit over compulsive when it comes to sensations I feel in my body. While most people wouldn't even concern themselves or even notice these normal bodily fluctuations, I feel like mine are heightened, and each one has a huge sign pointing at it saying "I could be a terminal illness!" I started seeing a new doctor last year, and she's awesome! I really like her. One of the first things I discussed with her was my health anxiety. She assured me that most of the funny little gurgles and twinges in our body are not usually reason for concern - it just means things are working the way they should. I've remembered that over the years, anytime I'm about to go over the edge with my worrying and over-analyzing.

I'm also pretty sure that I could perform open-heart surgery if I had to, purely because I have read up on every single disease known to man. And I've probably thought I've had every one of those illnesses too. Google has both calmed and created some of my worse health fears. If you suffer from hypochondria, stay away from Dr. Google. He always gives you the worse case scenario. Every single time.

The worse thing about anxiety is that it creates a vicious cycle. Because I have anxiety about symptoms I am feeling, my anxiety creates more scary symptoms like dizziness, shallow breathing, pain, etc. These are real sensations, so how do you know if they should be of concern? Are they real problems or just side effects of my scary anxiety monster?

My anxiety got so bad a few years ago, I actually saw a therapist about it. I would spend every minute of the day on my smart phone looking up different diseases I thought I had. When you looked at the browser on my phone, I had dozens of windows open - all related to health issues. I knew I needed help because it was affecting my every day life. I was depressed, irritable and obsessed.

The therapist helped so much - it was just common sense stuff but it just sunk in. She knew that I was a person of faith and said, if I truly believed that God had a plan for me, I would just live without fear knowing that there is a bigger plan for me. She also said that people get cancer all the time and live, so not everything that goes wrong is a death sentence. She gave me some other ideas to help distract me, and to alleviate some of my physical symptoms. It made a huge difference but... I've had a slight relapse as of late.

It seems like every day I hear another story of some strong, young, healthy person getting cancer and dying within a few weeks. It just oozes into my brain and I can't shake it. I've heard two stories this week of people who had sore backs and all of a sudden, within a few weeks, they died of cancer. So when my back started hurting this week, I went to that dark, scary place in my mind. I was so worried about it I was actually in tears over it, and being super short with my kids. Even though part of me knows it's all in my head, the other part totally buys it. Having anxiety is like being trapped in your own mind, stuck with your own scary thoughts, and there is no way out. Your brain is like a prison.

Anxiety IS a mental illness and should not to be taken lightly. It really can have a negative effect on your life if you let it consume your every thought, and if it stops you from living your life to the fullest.

Will I be this way for the rest of my life? There's a pretty good chance. Do I have the tools to help get me out of those spirals of doom? I sure do. Will I die one day? Of course. But as Linus said: "Worrying won't stop the bad stuff from happening, it just stops you from enjoying the good."

Do any of you suffer from anxiety or a mental illness? It's much more common than we realize.

Introvert or Extrovert?

Simple question today: are you an introvert or an extrovert?

I was listening to my favourite podcast on the way to work this morning and had a revelation - I think I'm an introvert who just happens to be comfortable around people and crowds. The reason I think I'm an introvert is that I thrive when I am able to work alone, in a quiet environment. I'm way more effective working from home than in the office. I also relish the times of the day where I get to be alone with my thoughts. That's when I find myself at peace and able to recharge again. Then again, I'm probably happy when I'm alone because I don't have the constant sound of children yapping in my ear. My kids never. stop. talking. I love them but "simma down nah"! Seriously...

Listen to Chalene Johnson's podcast to see where you fall!

A Brilliant New Christmas Tradition

I wish I could take all the credit for this idea but, alas, it was a snag from a Facebook post I saw a few months ago. I just thought it was brilliant and that I could probably pull it off inexpensively too!

The idea is to do 12 Days of Christmas books. For the twelve nights before Christmas, your children get to open a new book under the tree to read at bedtime. Here's a look at the books I found at our local Thrift Store! Shout out to the Mennonite Central Committee thrift stores. All proceeds are used locally and globally to meet basic human needs and work for peace and justice. They do awesome work! And I get to shop economically and sustainably. Win, win, people.

I made sure to go the morning they were going to bring the Christmas books out because I also knew, they would be gone quickly. I was able to by 12 books for $2.00! Woo!! I was pretty proud of myself. And the Disney book has a bunch of stories. I would like to find one about the nativity to add to the collection so I might still try to find one. But they had ELF! That is one of our ultimate, favourite Christmas movies.

I also bought a big fuzzy Santa blanket for us to cuddle under for $10, and I've bought them new Christmas PJs that they will also get the night of the first book. It's one of those traditions I can see them remembering with great fondness when they get older. At least I hope!

Do you have some Christmas traditions you'd like to share? Some that might be inexpensive but so warm and fuzzy, you just can't stand it? Tell us about it!

8 Tips to Help You Stick to a Budget!

We're getting to the end of my husband's two week pay period. And since we use his paycheque to pay for groceries, things usually start getting pretty skimpy around here towards the end of the two weeks. It's a lot of searching the back of the pantry and the bottom of the freezer to use what we have. I find it kind of an exciting challenge! It's like the Food Network show "Chopped" - where they give the chefs a random basket of weird items like cotton candy, a rabbit's foot, rutabaga and coconut milk and they have to create a gourmet dish based on those ingredients. I tell ya, we've made some pretty interesting meals around here while we've been budgeting! If we needed to, we could take money from another area, but I hate messing up my system!

Here are 8 tips to help you stick to your budget.

1. Write it down

Every dollar should be accounted for and you should have each dollar spent on paper before you spend it for realz. You have a finite amount of money allocated to each area. Each dollar has a name. Each dollar has a purpose.

2. Step away from temptation

Are you a mall-aholic? A Starbucks fanatic? If these places throw you into a spending frenzy, just WALK AWAY. It's time to get serious with your budgeting and spending, so why tempt yourself unnecessarily?

3. Stick to your envelope system

If you want to find out how to use an cash envelope system, you can check out this post. By using cash for all your purchases, you really do have a lot more control over your spending, because if there isn't any money in the envelope for it, you shouldn't be buying it! At the beginning of each month, really think about the expenses you will have that month that may be different from previous months. Things like birthday parties, swimming lessons for the kids, Christmas, hockey equipment, etc. You get the picture. If you know there is an expense coming up in a few months, start budgeting now.

4. Only buy what's on your shopping list

This is not the time to try Kobe beef! Stick to the basics, make as much food from scratch as you can, and learn to shop using sales from flyers and coupons. And remember to take advantage of reward systems like PC Plus Points or Shopper's Drug Mart Optimum Points (in Canada).

5. Exercise at home

I discussed this in a previous post but last time I checked, you didn't need a gym membership to get healthy. Walking works, and you can get lots of FREE workouts on Youtube. Jillian Michael's has a bunch. This is my favourite one! Imagine how hot I'll be after doing this workout for a few years and paying off my debt? Rawr....

6. Visit the library

It's a free place to take your kids for a fun little outing, and you can go home with books, DVDs and audio books. And it doesn't cost anything. Plus reading is really good for your brain. It makes you way smarter than watching TV will. Blogs are great reading too ;)

7. Carpool

Have any people at work you can carpool with? I know sometimes we just want to rock out alone in our car to Iron Maiden but you can save so much money by splitting the cost of gas and parking fees. Just make sure you pick someone you actually like, and who has good hygiene.

8. Create a vision board

Some people think this is a little too much woo-woo for them but in my opinion, a vision board is a road map that everyone in the family can follow, and it helps remind them why they are making big sacrifices. Take a bunch of magazines and start pinning up the fun things you're family will be able to do once you've paid down debt, and have been able to save.


Have any great ideas to help us stick to a budget! Send me a comment. Please, oh please?

Fears are Stories We Tell Ourselves

Fear is a feeling most of us want to avoid because it is usually associated with something we don't want to face. It means we will have to deal with a situation that will be unknown, uncomfortable and sometimes unbearable.

However, in certain situations, fear is the part of an experience that makes it so worth it. It's that fire that makes us feel ALIVE - if you are brave enough to take the chance.

Back in August, I was offered a new job by a company I admired, and whose values I shared. Although I absolutely knew it was a good fit, I had the fear. Well actually, many fears.

Here is a list of my fears:

- something new = something scary
- what if I let people down
- what if I'm not that good at this new job
- what if they fire me (you never know)
- what if it's not right for my family
- what if it pushes me to do some scary things (more fear)
- what if I regret my decision

What you have to understand is that I had been with the same employer for well over 10 years, and frankly, I had it good. Great boss, great co-workers, cool job, and most importantly, comfort. Comfort knowing the schedule worked for my family, and that I understood my job very well. But is the grass greener on the other side? Was it worth the risk switching to something new?

I spent two weeks during my summer vacation weighing the pros and the cons. But no matter how I sliced it, the pros were kicking the cons butts. I must have talked it through with everyone I knew, even though I knew very well what was holding me back. It was that scary, dark monster named fear.

Then the universe started throwing signs at me, as it always seems to do! I kept hearing people talk in the media about how fear was the part that made them realize the decision was a good one because the fear represented a challenge and personal growth. And that if the new challenge was amazing, it was because you overcame those unknowns and those fears. Okay universe - I hear you loud and clear!

So I did take the plunge. I made the change. And it was new, and it was scary but it has lit a spark in my life that I am so thankful for. I've had to learn so many new things, and have had to push myself outside my comfort zone, and it has affected my entire life. Not only do I wake up early every day to workout, I am a firm believer in goal setting and gratitude journaling. The new job has lead me to the world of podcasts - they are such an important tool when you want to learn from experts on any subject. And it's also inspired me to get blogging again. My love for writing has been reignited. I'm so grateful.

I just happened to be watching Dancing with the Stars yesterday, when Bethany Mota said something that totally jumped out at me. She said, "I decided to do Dancing with the Stars because it absolutely terrified me. I thought, it's about time to just go for it. " For her to challenge the fear monster at her age, knowing it would make her a better person, speaks to her wisdom.

Fear, yeah it can be a very unwelcome customer sometimes. But I bet if you look back on the scariest times in your life, you will agree that facing the fear has made you grow and become a better person. Fear reminds you what it feels like to be alive and to take risks. So next time you feel fear crawling into your stomach like a big knot, take that energy and go with it. It might be the best decision you ever made.

4 Ways To Get Your Kids Involved In The Family Finanaces

We've all had these conversations with our kids:

Kid: "Mom, can I get that new Elsa doll? I really want it, it's so cute and I'll play with it so much!"

Parent: "Why don't you put it on your Christmas list?"

Kid: "Christmas? It's July, I can't wait that long. I want it now!"

Parent: "We can't just buy things whenever we want, just because we want it. You have to decide if it's worth it, and if it is, you need to save for it."

Kid: "But I want it RIGHT NOW!"

Parent throws hands up and wonders why he/she ever thought having kids was a good idea. *wink, wink.

It's not that all kids are all bad and greedy, psychologically-speaking, they start off their lives mostly under the assumption that the world revolves around them. Hence the reason why you have so many meltdowns at Target with your two-year-old. (Or in my case, three-year-old.) But as they get a little, older, like 4 and up, you can start explaining to them how finances work and how THEY are also part of the family's financial fabric. It also teaches them, while they are young, that you aren't just entitled to stuff. You have to work to get what you want. I'm not raising any slackers here!

Here are 5 ways to get your kids involved in the family finances.

1. Discuss the plan

I actually just had a detailed discussion with my 8-year-old this morning, while we were lying in my bed, about how our financial plan is laid out. As I've said 40 times already, we're following The Total Money Makeover: Classic Edition: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness.

This plan is laid out so you are following 7 baby steps to get to your goal. We are currently on step #2, PAYING OFF YOUR DEBT.

Our daughter was saying how much she wants to go on a Disney Cruise. I said once we pay off the money we owe, we will start saving for some fun activities like a cruise, but for now, our focus is to pay off what we owe. I also told her we need to save money for retirement. She couldn't understand why we needed to worry about retirement when we are still young. I told her we need close to a million dollars to retire comfortably. She was blown away! But at least now she understands why we need to pay things off and save.

2. Set up an allowance system

I don't have an allowance set up for my little guy - he just doesn't quite get it yet. But our 8-year-old is old enough and we have set up a cool system based on chores. I got the idea from Pinterest. We used to pay her every week based on her list of chores but it didn't work well for us. I like that she can do a chore and quickly see the payoff. Now, she doesn't get the money right away. After she does a chore, we put it into her chore jar. At the end of the week, she gets her money.

3. Set up a envelope system for your kids

Now that our daughter has money from an allowance every week, we want to teach her how to save and give, not just spend. So we have three envelopes for her: Spend, Save, Give. This teaches her the importance of putting money aside to save for bigger items, but it also teaches her to be grateful and to share her blessings with others.

4. Create a vision board 

Some people think vision boards are fluffy, or that you just make them, sit back, and wait for your dreams to unfold. That's not the idea at all. A vision board is like a road map to achieving your goals. I've had a few vision boards over the years, and while some of the goals didn't occur until a few years later, some of them came true in eery ways. (I'll discuss vision boards in depth in an upcoming post). So I challenge you to sit down with your kids, grab a stack of magazines and start planning your family's vision for the future. Put it up where every one can see it and work together to reach those goals. I do truly believe that if you see your dreams in front of you, they will unfold if you work towards them. Thoughts become things.

How do you talk to your kids about money? Do they have allowances? Do they know how to save? I'd love to get your feedback!

I Miss My Grade 9 Love Letters

You know what makes me sad, especially as a girl who has been a writer most of her life? With texting and instant messaging, and all the other electronic communication devices at our disposal, we are slowly loosing the art of letter writing. I'm not even talking about formal letters that contain an address at the top and a formal salutation. I'm talking about the good ol' fashion letters we used to pass to our friends in school, hoping we wouldn't get caught and humiliated by the teacher. I'm sure kids still pass letters around today, but they definitely have more options than we did when it comes to communicating.

A few years back, me and a few of my best friends from grade school got together to read the letters (most of them to and from boyfriends) we had kept so well preserved from our childhood. We sat back with a few cocktails on my deck and pulled out our boxes and bags of letters. And do you remember the crafty, origami-like folding that was involved?

We each took turns pulling a letter out of our magic stash, and read them out loud. I even read from my diary, which at various parts, actually dissed my two friends. Just silly things like "I can't believe so and so. She thinks she's so cool just because she has Debbie Gibson's Electric Youth perfume." They didn't take it too personally.  And boy, did we laugh. Like full-on belly laughs. It was so good for the soul!

Since this little exercise, I've been lucky enough to stumble upon this hilarious podcast from the CBC called "Grownups Read Things They Wrote As Kids". It was hosted by Dan Misener, and it basically features grownups reading stories, letters or diaries from their childhood, on stage, in front of an audience. There are no new episodes but you can still listen to the podcasts. Every time I've listened to it, I literally LOL. Which reminds me, there were no LOLs in my letters. Back in the 90s, we used to call it "ha ha ha". I'm like, so old.

I think what makes this podcast particularly adorable, is that most of the people in the crowd grew up in the same era, and probably hear a lot of themselves in the stories and letters that are shared. It's probably the reason why there is such a roar from the audience. My favourite stories are those when you hear these adults share how their childhood-selves pictured their future lives as grownups. Some of the ridiculous notions they came up with were beyond hilarious.

What prompted me to write about this is seeing my own daughter write in her diary at the ripe old age of 8. I haven't actually read any of the excerpts, because it's private, but I'm just so happy she is writing for the sake of writing. I know they do lots of writing at school but there is something so delicious about writing down your thoughts and dreams on paper. It's something I still do today but in the form of goal setting and gratitude journaling. Pen on paper is still the best. I don't care what gadgets we have. It's our personal mark on the world. I hope everyone continues to write, old school.

So do yourself a favour, listen to this podcast! It makes me feel so nostalgic and happy. I'm sure you'll feel the same way. Do you still have your old letters and diaries? And if I can find mine (yes, I've misplaced them), I will definitely share an excerpt or two.

5 Tips to Being Fit While Budgeting

I'll be the first to admit that I am not the thinnest person in the world but I have lost over 50 lbs and continue on my weight loss journey, one that has taken a longggggg time. Although I don't have a sexy bikini body, I am pretty fit because I exercise almost every day, and really make an effort to eat well. The food part is definitely the most difficult for me! Mostly because I love to eat so cutting calories and focusing on eating whole foods is not my strong suit.

A few months back, I remember seeing a post on Facebook from a woman who said she had no choice but to be obese because she was poor and healthy food cost too much, and gym memberships were too expensive. There is SOME truth to the food aspect. Eating lots of fruits and veggies every day does add up but there are some ways to get around that which I'll talk about in a moment. But when it comes to exercise, there is NO excuse. I exercise every single day without using a gym membership or fancy equipment at home.

Here's how to be fit physically and financially:

1. Not all fruits and veggies have to be expensive

When we go grocery shopping, we try not to purchase much in the way of processed foods. Don't get me wrong, we still buy some, but not much. My kids tend to gravitate towards fruit and even raw veggies - mostly because we don't have much in the way of sugary snacks in our house so they have no choice. But this can get pretty expensive when they are cruising through a bag of apples in a few days. But there are other alternatives that can stretch your fruit and veggie budget. I buy frozen peas and corn when they are $1-$2 a bag. This lasts us probably for four meals. Same goes with frozen fruit. It can be a bit expensive but if you catch them on sale, they are great in a smoothie with yogurt and milk. Canned fruits and veggies aren't as nutritious as frozen or fresh just because they can contain a lot of salt and sugar, but look for products that contain no salt or added sugar if you can. This is still better than eating McDonalds, or eating KD every day. Which by the way, I still love KD.

2. Grow a garden or participate in a community garden program

Seeds are dirt cheap - pardon the pun. So throw those puppies in some soil and watch as you grow your own bounty. If you feel intimidated by gardening (which you shouldn't because it's pretty fool-proof) watch a video online or take a gardening book out from your library. And get your kids involved in the process. Learning how to grow food is such a great skill to have. I'm very fortunate my family had acres of gardens when I was growing up, and I had with them every summer. Now my kids are learning from me. Pass on the knowledge!

3. Canning and freezing

The other day I got a HUGE box of crab apples from someone in our community for $5! I talk about it in this post. I was able to freeze 6 bags of apples and make 12 jars of apple sauce - and it was sooo good! Again there are so many resources online for freezing and preserving fruits and vegetables. If you see a great fruit/veggie sale, buy 'em up and freeze them.

4. Bake your own bread

I admit, this sounds like a lot of work. Everyone is probably thinking, "this woman must have a lot of time on her hands to be making her own bread". Um, I have no time for anything. I work, I have two kids, I workout every day, I blog and I take care of a home. I use a bread machine (which by the way, I've seen at thrift stores for just a few dollars) and I use the dough cycle to make the dough, then I form the dough into two loaves and let them rise on a cookie sheet, then I bake them. The bread machine does most of the work while I'm doing other things. This is usually a Saturday or Sunday project. For our family of 4, two loaves easily lasts us a week or more. And making your own bread is super cheap. Here is my favourite recipe - it works every time! While it's a bun recipe, it works for bread too. I also substitute half of the white flour for whole wheat flour and cut down the sugar a bit.

5. Exercise is FREE

Last time I checked, walking didn't cost much. Neither did playing soccer with your kids. But if you feel you need a "real" workout, there are so many options you can do for cheap or free. I can watch youtube on my TV and that's how I do most of my circuit training days. Jillian Michaels has a bunch of Youtube videos up through BeFit including The 30 Day Shred, No More Trouble Zones Complete Workout, and 6 Week Six-Pack Abs, just to name a few. The most these workouts require are your hand weights and those aren't even necessary. You can also rent fitness DVDs from your local library or borrow/swap with friends. When it comes down to it, nothing beats a brisk walk anyway. And the benefits of being active go so far beyond how you look. Exercise releases endorphins, and endorphins make you happy (I learned that from Elle Woods from Legally Blonde). It's hard to get moving but once you're done, what an awesome feeling!


If you have any tips on being fit and frugal, I'd love to hear them. I hope to include a lot of this information in a book, so the more information I can share, the better!

Top 10 Christmas Movies on Netflix USA

I love, love, love Netflix! What did we do before Netflix? My kids don't even know what commercials are because they rarely watch regular cable. How things have changed since I was a kid! I remember having to strategically manoeuvre the rabbit ears on our little tube TV to catch Beverly Hills 90210 from KNRR in Pembina, ND. And it was scrambled at best. But Jason Priestly was still gorgeous through the snow.

I am also a HUGE fanatic of Christmas movies. I love them all! My most favourite activity on a cold winter's day, is sitting wrapped up in fuzzy blankets with my kiddos, with the fireplace roaring, watching Christmas movies. It reminds me of my childhood and I get so warm and melty inside. Sigh... Why is this post so nostalgic? "Focus, Natalie!"

When Netflix first came out, the selection of Christmas flix was pretty limited but they sure have stepped it up. I've compiled a list of my fave holiday movies from Netflix US (as of November 2014). Stay tuned for the Canadian edition!

Christmas with the Kranks

Miracle of 34th Street

Curious George:
A Very Monkey Christmas

Mickey's Once Upon A Christmas

The Nightmare Before Christmas

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

Elf

Arthur Christmas

Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch
Stole Christmas

The Legend of Frosty the Snowman

Tomorrow we'll discuss inexpensive ways to start holiday traditions with your children. What are you favourite holiday movies? Mine are Elf, White Christmas, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation and A Christmas Story.

6 Money-Saving Strategies for the Holiday Season

There is no time of year I love more than the holiday season. I love the Christmas carols, the smells of cinnamon and pine, the time with family, the decorations - in my book, it's all awesome! But this is also the time of year where panic usually sets in because I know I have to budget for Christmas spending and figure out where the money is going to come from.

However, for the first time in many years, we are going into the holiday season with a real plan. Because we started The Total Money Makeover: Classic Edition: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitnessa few months ago, I've already been saving every week. It feels good to know that we will have enough money saved so we won't be strapped for cash or using credit to purchase gifts this year.

6 Money-Saving Strategies for the Holiday Season:

1. Save NOW
I am posting this on November 11th so that means you have over a month to start putting away a little money each pay period to build a bit of savings to get ready for your holiday shopping. This might mean you have a few less lattes, and sell a few items online, but save and make it happen. Ideally, if you can buy a little all year, it won't be such a tight crunch when Christmas rolls around.

2. Start a list
Sit down and figure out who you HAVE to buy for and determine a set amount for each person. Even if you think Timmy is going to look so adorable in that Rudolph sweater, avoid buying more than you budgeted for. I start gathering ideas for my kids as soon as they start spewing out ideas. I keep a list on my phone so it's handy when I need to add to it, and I can wait for deals when they come up.

3. Don't buy for every person you know
I know we tend to think that we need to buy for more people than we really need to. Is it necessary to buy for extended family, all your co-workers and the florist? Learn to draw the line! If these people ARE important to you, why not send them a beautiful card with a heart-felt note? That means so much more than some chocolates or cheese log anyway.

4. Think strategically
Keep your eyes peeled for sales. Buy online IF you can get great deals and free shipping. Cyber Monday can have some crazy cool deals  - this year it falls on December 1st. Mark your calendars. For online shopping, I love Zulily and Amazon.com! Use money-saving apps like Checkout 51 or Coupgon, and use your rewards points (see tip below).

*** This is a really awesome tip for those of you in Canada. While I was shopping at The Real Canadian Superstore a few months ago, I mentioned how much I love the PC Plus Program. The clerk said her mom saves all her points throughout the year so she can redeem them at Christmas time to purchase a majority of her gifts. I totally snagged the idea! I have almost $100 in points saved up (I started a few months ago). I highly recommend you get this app and card, especially if you're buying groceries there anyway. Most weeks they will give you an automatic 25,000 pts ($25) if you spend $250 on groceries. This is on top of the points you get from purchasing selected items!

5. Make homemade gifts
Even before I was a money-saving machine, I often made homemade gifts for neighbours, teachers, daycare workers, etc. because I feel like it means more. Last year we made this awesome, DYI Homemade Hot Cocoa Mix from Seeded at the Table. We packaged them in mason jars wrapped up all pretty-like, and gave them to our closest neighbours. The ingredients were fairly inexpensive and it made quite a large amount. We even made a batch to keep in our cupboards. It lasted a long time!


6. Do your research
If you want to make sure you're buying quality products, check out online reviews. You can also check out what stores are having deals from the convenience of your computer or smart phone. Most of your favourite retailers have emails you can sign up for which notify you when they have promotions.

Stick to your plan, start early, and don't forget what this time of the year is really all about. What are some of your money-saving strategies for Christmas?

Quiet Breakfast

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. Or in our case, not even a cat or a dog or a cat.

5 Reasons You Need To Join The 5 O'Clock Club

On my last post, I vaguely mentioned that I am a proud member of the 5 o'clock club. For those of you who don't know what the 5 o'clock club is, well let me enlighten you! It's pretty simple. There's a secret group of crazy people that get up hours before most even hit the snooze button. These insane people get up at 5am... on purpose. And I am a proud member of this club. Honestly, it has completely changed my life. I text two other members at 5am to keep us all accountable too!

Here are 5 reasons why you should be part of this crazy cool club:

My tic-toc clock

1. Time ALONE
I'm a mom, wife, employee... You get where I'm going with this. I rarely get a minute alone! But when I get up at 5am and quietly tiptoe to the main floor of our house, it is so quiet. I can actually hear the clock on my piano tick. It's a wonderfully, delicious sound.


2. Eating without interruptions
Again, if you're a parent, you know that it's unusual to sit down for an entire meal without being interrupted by spills, fights or other miscellaneous mishaps. When I sit down with my breakfast, and there is no one around to bother me, it feels like an indulgence. I can eat without little fingers in my food, and I can take my time.




3. Getting your workout out of the way
When I first get my feet on the floor and my behind out of bed, I'll admit, I'm not super thrilled with the idea of heading to our basement to do my workout. But once I get down there and start, I know that euphoric feeling that comes after a workout is just minutes away, and my whole day will be better because of it. I usually aim to workout every day (some days are lighter than others) but even if I miss a day or two, I've still managed to get in 5 or 6 days a week. Exercising has such a tremendous effect on most aspects of your life. So just do it, will ya! I find it makes me happier and more productive.



4. Quiet time to set goals

Another part of my personal development that I absolutely love is the time I spend setting goals for my life, both longterm and daily. I revisit my crazy cool goals for the year on a weekly basis, and set daily goals related to my longterm life goals and my health goals. I carry my notepad with me all day long so I can check the tasks off my goal list for the day. I love knowing that I'm working toward my family's goals EVERY SINGLE DAY with momentum and passion.



5. A relaxed pace
I wake up two and a half hours before I have to leave for work so this gives me lots of time to get ready at my own pace, and properly organize my family in the morning. My kids have also started waking up a bit earlier - probably because I'm awake earlier too. They usually wake up around 6-6:30 which gives us all time to unwind before we set out for school, daycare and work. Even my daycare provider mentioned how much happier my little guy has been since he's had some time to relax before being whisked out the door.

Are you part of the 5 o'clock club? What do you love about it? Or, if the idea of waking up at 5am is disturbing to you, tell us why! I'd love to hear your feedback.